Ya, we think he is pretty cute too. Congrats Dave and Lynne!
8/29/10
8/23/10
Olivia's Funeral
Olivia's funeral was on August 10, 2010. It was such a beautiful service and we are grateful for everyone who participated and helped out in so many ways! We have been overwhelmed with love by everyone we know. We have received so many notes, gifts, and flowers and we are so grateful for your support and love for our sweet little girl. Thank you a hundred times over!
The service was held at Sunset Gardens Cemetery. When Ryan and I were deciding where to lay our sweet little girl, we knew that we wanted to put her somewhere pretty, somewhere we could go often and where we could feel the peace of the Spirit. We looked at a couple of places, and when I saw Sunset Gardens, I felt like this is where I wanted my baby girl to be. It has a beautiful view of the mountains and across the way, there is a statue of our Savior. The cemetery has a baby area that is separated from the rest of the cemetery by trees, which I absolutely love. I love having an area specifically for children, so all those children can be together. Something about that thought brings me peace. It was the perfect spot for Olivia.
We had a short family gathering before the graveside service where we were able to say goodbye one last time to our precious daughter. She looked so beautiful, even then. She was wrapped in the quilt that I had made for her-or half of it, rather. Half for her and half for me to hold and remember her by. I was glad I made that quilt for her so she could have a little piece of me forever. My sister's husband, Dave, made a slide show of the pictures from the hospital of Olivia that played during the family gathering. I loved looking at those pictures and remembering the time we had with our daughter. My dad ended the gathering with a family prayer and then we headed to the graveside for the service.
My dad and Ryan's dad carried the casket to the grave site. Our Bishop conducted the services. Ryan's Grandpa gave the opening prayer and then Ryan's dad said a few words about faith and the priesthood. His words definitely brought the Spirit and made me so grateful for the knowledge of the gospel and that families are eternal. Our sister-in-law Brooke and her family sang a beautiful mix of primary songs. When they began singing Families Can be Together Forever I felt the spirit very strongly. I know that because of the Savior, nothing can separate me from Olivia. She will always be mine and that is a great comfort. Following the singing, Ryan said a few words. We knew it would be hard for him to talk at that point, but we did not want to have this great service for Olivia and then not even let people get to know her a little bit. Ryan talked about our adventures with Olivia and her short life on Earth with us. From the uncertain pregnancy to the day we finally got to meet her, we were guided by God to make decisions that would be best for her. She was truly a Child of our Heavenly Father who we were privileged to spend those 37 hours with. Ryan finished the service with the dedicatory prayer, dedicating that spot of ground as a sacred place for our little girl.
There were definitely times that made me sad, but more than anything, the service was very uplifting. It provided the opportunity for each person to feel of the Spirit and gain a stronger testimony of the great eternal Plan of Happiness, for that is what Olivia taught me, among many others: That God's Plan of Happiness is the called such because it brings peace, hope, and that happiness he promises in times that seem impossible to bear.
The service was held at Sunset Gardens Cemetery. When Ryan and I were deciding where to lay our sweet little girl, we knew that we wanted to put her somewhere pretty, somewhere we could go often and where we could feel the peace of the Spirit. We looked at a couple of places, and when I saw Sunset Gardens, I felt like this is where I wanted my baby girl to be. It has a beautiful view of the mountains and across the way, there is a statue of our Savior. The cemetery has a baby area that is separated from the rest of the cemetery by trees, which I absolutely love. I love having an area specifically for children, so all those children can be together. Something about that thought brings me peace. It was the perfect spot for Olivia.
We had a short family gathering before the graveside service where we were able to say goodbye one last time to our precious daughter. She looked so beautiful, even then. She was wrapped in the quilt that I had made for her-or half of it, rather. Half for her and half for me to hold and remember her by. I was glad I made that quilt for her so she could have a little piece of me forever. My sister's husband, Dave, made a slide show of the pictures from the hospital of Olivia that played during the family gathering. I loved looking at those pictures and remembering the time we had with our daughter. My dad ended the gathering with a family prayer and then we headed to the graveside for the service.
My dad and Ryan's dad carried the casket to the grave site. Our Bishop conducted the services. Ryan's Grandpa gave the opening prayer and then Ryan's dad said a few words about faith and the priesthood. His words definitely brought the Spirit and made me so grateful for the knowledge of the gospel and that families are eternal. Our sister-in-law Brooke and her family sang a beautiful mix of primary songs. When they began singing Families Can be Together Forever I felt the spirit very strongly. I know that because of the Savior, nothing can separate me from Olivia. She will always be mine and that is a great comfort. Following the singing, Ryan said a few words. We knew it would be hard for him to talk at that point, but we did not want to have this great service for Olivia and then not even let people get to know her a little bit. Ryan talked about our adventures with Olivia and her short life on Earth with us. From the uncertain pregnancy to the day we finally got to meet her, we were guided by God to make decisions that would be best for her. She was truly a Child of our Heavenly Father who we were privileged to spend those 37 hours with. Ryan finished the service with the dedicatory prayer, dedicating that spot of ground as a sacred place for our little girl.
There were definitely times that made me sad, but more than anything, the service was very uplifting. It provided the opportunity for each person to feel of the Spirit and gain a stronger testimony of the great eternal Plan of Happiness, for that is what Olivia taught me, among many others: That God's Plan of Happiness is the called such because it brings peace, hope, and that happiness he promises in times that seem impossible to bear.
8/9/10
Olivia Lane Gardner
OLIVIA LANE GARDNER
8.6.10 -- 8.7.10
5 LBS 11 OZ. 20 1/2 IN.
8.6.10 -- 8.7.10
5 LBS 11 OZ. 20 1/2 IN.
She is our beautiful daughter forever! We love her so much!!
8/3/10
Baby Girl Gardner
This baby girl should decide to make her appearance pretty soon, or they may force her out. They are throwing words around like "induction." Thursday is the deadline...
The upside? No more work for up to 12 weeks from now. Now that is good news!
The upside? No more work for up to 12 weeks from now. Now that is good news!
7/29/10
Cuteness
I (with help from others) have finally finished that quilt that I posted about here. It looks so good! I'm so excited about it! I finished the front and then shipped it all off to Illinois so Vivian could do the actual quilting portion of the quilt! It is so soft and looks so professional! Thanks to Vivian for making it so cute and wonderful! I love it so much! Can't wait to wrap my little girl in it!
7/28/10
7/23/10
Family Reunion
Last weekend we went to Palisades Lake near Manti, Utah for the Howells family reunion. We all stayed in a big cabin so it was fun to see everyone and just hang out. We went rock climbing (we meaning Ryan did, I watched from the bottom of the wall) and hung out at the Lake, played games and talked. It was a blast! I was a little worried going away when I was so close to my due date but thankfully nothing "came round the mountain." haha.
We didn't take as many pictures as we should have but here are some fun ones that will help you see all the fun things we did. My favorite part was sitting by the lake hanging out and swimming. Swimming was totally great too. It was so much fun! We stopped on the way there at the Manti Temple and walked around taking pictures. The temple is so pretty, I think it looks like a castle! It was beautiful! Thanks for Ryan's family for coming and hanging out with us!!
We didn't take as many pictures as we should have but here are some fun ones that will help you see all the fun things we did. My favorite part was sitting by the lake hanging out and swimming. Swimming was totally great too. It was so much fun! We stopped on the way there at the Manti Temple and walked around taking pictures. The temple is so pretty, I think it looks like a castle! It was beautiful! Thanks for Ryan's family for coming and hanging out with us!!
7/12/10
Photos
Stadium of Fire and Happy Birthday to me!
We got to sit with our Farrell Friends. (I always want to say Brassfields because I forget they aren't Brassfields anymore...)
The Fireworks from Stadium of Fire
Two very handsome men
Two very handsome men
You can see his teeth in this picture. So cute.
Thanks to the Brassfield clan for the fun apron. 36 1/2 weeks:
(and if you didn't notice, brown hair won... at least that is what I decided as I sat in the chair to get it done... I'm happy I did brown. I think it looks more natural...)
7/4/10
Blonde Vs. Brunette
I'm getting my hair done on Tuesday and I need help. I can never decide which I like more Blonde Andrea or Brunette Andrea. Please help before Tuesday because otherwise I have to decide all by myself. Oh, and one other thing... please don't judge hair by pre-pregnancy vs. pregnancy Andrea because we all know that then, Brunette Andrea would win and that just isn't fair.
Here is Blonde Andrea (AKA Pregnant Andrea--again, don't let this factor influence you: focus on the hair--This is also not a professional photo so it isn't as good quality as the picture below).
Brunette Andrea (AKA pre-pregnancy Andrea)
7/2/10
We Look Good in HD
Here is a fun way for all you far away to see my big growing belly. This is me at 34 weeks. But the real exciting news is--the picture was taken with our new fancy camera. Happy Birthday to Me!! And really, don't we look good in HD?
I mean, look how cool the sky looks behind Ry! So crystal clear! I'm loving it. Now I just need to figure out how to use all the fun features! More to come for sure!
I mean, look how cool the sky looks behind Ry! So crystal clear! I'm loving it. Now I just need to figure out how to use all the fun features! More to come for sure!
6/30/10
Angel Watch
A few of the quotes really hit me and said what I was feeling, thinking, going through so much better than I could ever say them. So I thought I'd share a little of what goes through my head these days.
"love this baby into the world." One of my favorite things to do it to tell our baby that we love her and that she is the most important thing to us. That way, I know she knows. I need her to know.
This does not have to be the most traumatic experience in a couple's life together. Often a husband and wife will grow closer together, and the father is also given a chance to bond with the child he can't see. Second favorite is when Ryan feels her move. It is funny because a lot of times when I'm with other people, she doesn't want to move around much and be felt, but when Ryan puts his hand on my huge tummy, she flips, kicks, moves all around freely. I think she knows that is her dad out there. She loves him.
But what Angel Watch tries to do is to re-frame what a miracle is: not a cure, perhaps, but maybe a live birth, and if not a live birth at least a chance to create memories and to learn, for example, what music made the baby kick in the womb. It has been a miracle that our little girl has been inside of me for so long. The last time we saw the genetic counselor was in March and even then she said, "It's remarkable that she has made it this far." And yet, here we are at 35 weeks-my belly bigger than ever and my baby as active as ever. That to me is a miracle. That we get to feel her and get to know her because she is ours forever.
"We learned that through really hard times, there is a way to be happy, to love the seconds you have of happiness and joy." There are sad times, but there are so many happy times. Like when we saw her on the Ultrasound and she had the hiccups. I laughed pretty hard about that. To look up at the screen and see her little diaphragm going up and down while feeling the little twitch of hiccups inside of me. It made me truly happy. I love when I put my hand on the part of my belly where I know her feet are and I feel her foot scrape across my hand. It makes me happy because I realize there is my child inside of me and she has these cute little feet that one day I get to hold and kiss and love. And that makes me happy (I swear, I'm happy even though it brings tears to my eyes). We have to find happiness in this time because to not is dumb. I want my baby to hear me laugh and to feel me smile; not only know the sound of my cry and the feeling of sadness. She deserves a smile and laughter for all of her life. So for her and because of her I still smile and laugh and love life.
Our baby girl is getting so close to coming out to meet us and a part of me is terrified. I tell her she can stay in there forever if she needs to (even though the swollen ankles and tired feet say otherwise). I would do anything for her and I know she knows that we love her a lot. She is one lucky baby to have so much love around her.
6/23/10
How Could You Not Go to California for THIS!!
She is so adorable it kills me to leave her! But it was fun to see her while I could! Love you Cade!
She loved sporting my glasses and I love the look she is giving me in this picture, like, "What are you looking at?" haha.
Lookin' good!
6/3/10
I Have the Best Mom Ever
Ya, those are my new shoes on my feet. She really does love me. Thanks Mom! This deserves another look. So beautiful!
5/27/10
Lately...
Here are some random pictures of our life of late.
We got an email the other day inviting us to a new graduate alumni pre-game cookout. We had J-Dawgs on the lawn and soaked up some sun. It was a pretty awesome day and we do love our baseball games. Not sure if the Cougars won because we left a little early, but that's okay. Here we are eating our hotdogs before the game.
We got an email the other day inviting us to a new graduate alumni pre-game cookout. We had J-Dawgs on the lawn and soaked up some sun. It was a pretty awesome day and we do love our baseball games. Not sure if the Cougars won because we left a little early, but that's okay. Here we are eating our hotdogs before the game.
Ryan eating in the shade because he hates the sun. Or, as he says, the sun hates him.
Ben and Shalon (Ryan's brother and wife) came to town to see us and so we went wandering around Thanksgiving Point-only to find out there was a sheep festival. We saw sheep, goats, horses, cows, a mini pony (it was tiny), and a lot of other animals. Here is Ryan feeding the baby goat corn. 
Ryan's birthday is coming up and so we of course got our yearly Tucano's Birthday Postcard. We headed to Tucanos with Ry's brothers and we pigged out on a lot of meat. Too much meat for most of us and really just too much grilled pineapple for me(seriously it is delicious). Everyone was making fun of me because when the pineapple came around I would take like 5 each time and everyone else took like 1. What can I say, I love that pineapple! Notice that in the first picture, I have never looked more pregnant. I think the amount of food I ate took up just as much room as the baby in there! Oh, we were full. 
After the feast. Relaxing and letting the digesting begin.
5/18/10
Dedication
Dedication is when Ryan wants steak for dinner and it's raining outside. Instead of cooking it on the stove, he goes out in the rain and heats up the grill to make his favorite meal. Incredible dedication and loyalty. It's admirable, really!
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